I should have been born in a log cabin. I’m convinced that I belong in an earlier generation.

Technology is to blame for my seemingly misplaced existence. I just know that I would have been far more comfortable with a rifle, an axe and a fishing pole in some old fashioned cabin atop a hillside overlooking pasture and woods.

Instead, here I am in a world of Blackberries, I-pods, instant messaging, texting, holograms, E-mail, internet, blogs and cell phones.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m all for technological advancement. It just makes me uncomfortable and generally unable to keep pace.

Believe it or not, I do not have a personal cell phone. I may be the only one in my neighborhood (or perhaps even my town). I certainly don’t have a PDA. But I do admit, I wouldn’t mind having an I-pod.

This overload of high tech gadgetry hit me the other morning while I was exercise walking on the bridge. A female jogger was coming the other way with her cell phone in one ear and the ear bud from her MP3 player in the other. Here she was, jogging for exercise, carrying on a conversation and presumably listening to music in the other ear. Overload. Overload. Danger… Will Robinson. (You’ll have to be over 40 to understand that)

Am I the only one on the planet who doesn’t care much for all this high tech hoopla?

Let’s start with computers. My aging brain is having big trouble keeping track of all my names and passwords. Do you hear me? How many computer names/passwords do you have. I have one to log on to my work computer, a separate one at work to log on to our network web site, another to log on to my corporate site for 401K and such, another one for my home computer, another one for a photography site I frequent, another for a music site I use, another for a stock market site, another for ordering photo prints, another for a financial investment house, another for a photo sharing site. You get the picture. Oh yeah, and I have to remember another set of numbers for the ATM.

You’re not supposed to keep all your names and passwords in your wallet or anything. So what’s a nearly 50 year old who lags behind technology to do?

Let me wax nostalgic for a moment. Remember the pink pads at the office where people wrote down phone messages. You know, the “while you were out” memos where phone numbers were written for people trying to reach you. I long for those pink slips. Nowadays you’re lucky to get a real person if you do call some business. Chances are you’ll get stuck in a never ending phone message tree. Suddenly, you’re trapped. All I wanted to do was talk with Joe Blow. Now you’re asking me to punch in the first three letters of his last name to try and find the right extension. Suppose you get through to that extension. Chances are good you’ll get Joe’s voice mail after all that. Yikes.

I still have two large crates of record albums. And a Sony turntable that works well. It’s the same stereo my wife and I bought shortly after we were married nearly 25 years ago. We still pull out and crank up the album music from time to time. It actually sounds fine with a little album hiss and occasional pop. I recall vividly when CD’s first became the rage and were destined to replace LP’s. Crystal clear music. That part was nice. I also remember thinking, I’ll never again have to worry about the record skipping, right? Wrong. CD’s skip and get stuck just like the old albums. So much for the high tech.

I’m not a video game person. But I know they’ve advanced exponentially over the years. I remember when “Pong” was a big deal. And it was the only game in town. I played Space Invaders while visiting the “Poison Apple” disco in the 70′s, but that was about the end of my gaming. Today’s gamers have the best graphics and action and sights and sounds. They can even “play” against others through the internet. Not exactly like playing “Pong” with my best friend on my parents’ old black and white TV.

I guess part of it comes down to fear. I’m a little afraid all this techo stuff is going to pass me by and I’ll never be able to catch up.

It boggles my mind to think about what gadgets we have yet to see. I’m sure in no time cars will be driving themselves down the high tech freeways. People inside the cars will be tele-conferencing with friends over enhanced video screens. Texting will have completely replaced genuine conversation by then. Let’s face it, you’ve probably already E-mailed one of your co-workers who’s sitting just a couple desks away. We’re practically there. No need for talking face to face

Despite my forlorn attitude about high tech, there are parts that I do enjoy. I’m addicted to Google. I use it every day at work for research and reference. I love GPS stuff as well. I love getting door-to-door travel directions from Mapquest or Google Maps.

I’m also enjoying writing on this computer keyboard. Word processing is awesome. No more keys getting jammed on my old fashioned manual typewriter. Oh yeah, that’s what I learned on and used for years.

I kind of hope God isn’t a big high tech guy. I’d like to think there’s room under his tent for geeky gadet guys and log cabin guys.

What say we shoot the big guy an E-mail and find out?

-STEVE

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