I can’t see you because I’m looking at me.  I would love to help you, but I don’t even realize that you have a problem and honestly… I am aghast at the fact that you have not acknowledged my problems.  How in the world do you expect me to help you if you aren’t going to help me?  Sound familiar?

Not long ago, I was deep into a project at my church, and preparations were being made for an event that we had planned for over a month.  The turnout wasn’t expected to be very large, but the material and the program were definitely ripe for those that chose to attend.  In my simple act of service, I was consumed with setting up for the event when a guy walked through the door and my natural instinct was to be polite and ask the question, “how ‘ya doin’ this evening?”  He answered with a smile as I continued preparations and he politely followed proper conversation protocol and asked, “and how are you?”  Without hesitating, I answered – “I’m good… no wait… I’m great… better yet… I’m blessed.”

I raised my eyes to meet his as I continued my preparations without pause and smiled.  The next phrase spoken to me caught me off guard and cut me to the core.  The gentleman said, “you didn’t hear what I said did you?”  I stopped what I was doing and wrinkled my brow with a questioning expression.  He continued, “you didn’t pay attention to what I said when you asked how I was doing… did you?”  Cold busted.  I was wondering what he said as I rolled back the tape and found nothing.  Not even a syllable of his response registered.  I wondered if he disclosed something important, amazing, tragic, or positive.  I turned red.

In that moment, it became quite apparent that I must not really care how he was doing – as my question was asked.  The hard, honest truth is that I was somewhat bothered by the exchange because I was busy preparing for the evening event and was just being polite-ish.  I hung my head then looked back at him and said, “I’m sorry for not listening.”  Apparently I missed something that was meaningful to him.

I know this story sounds a little trite.  But think about how many times you’ve asked someone how they are doing without really being concerned of the answer.  Or better yet, have you found yourself asking that questions in hopes of a reciprocating request of “and how are you?” only to grab the stage and start blabbering on about the tragedies in your daily life or the bragging on the micro victories that impressed you?

Me-Sightedness – focused and caught up in our own concerns… unable to see the needs of others.

In that simple exchange, I learned a little something about myself.  A shortcoming that I need help with.  I can no longer ask that question without remembering my exchange that evening and then tuning in to what the other person is saying.  I made the decision to not ask the question at all if I wasn’t going to engage in the conversation and truly focus on someone else.

We get so caught up in our own little universe from time to time, that we assume that everyone feels like we feel, believes what we believe, and hopes for the things we hope for.  As Christians, we must be better than that.  Our entire outlook is transformed when Christ begins to live within us.  We can walk around and play the role of “good christian man” all day, but truly not have a concern for others in our heart.  We get mired up in the difficulties of what’s going on around us that we can’t see the greater need or the impact for tomorrow.

Jesus Christ spent time with His disciples and taught them over and over again that there is a greater good at work and that concern for ourselves and what is happening today is hardly significant.  He spent so much time with the disciples teaching them about what is to come and how to prepare, that it sets the tone for His entire ministry.

Our challenge is to engage in the conversations that are going on around us.  Not so that we can find a way to make it about “us”, but to be the difference in the life of those around us who need guidance, reassurance, and affirmation that God is in control. Maybe this is more about my issues and my shortcomings… and perhaps I’m preaching to myself here.  But I have to believe that there are interactions we have on a daily basis that fall into this me-sightedness style of life.

May we all look to Christ as our example of being concerned for others… to the point of sacrificing our own desires to help someone else see the light today.
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